Hardly Evil at All

I bet if you took all the evil people in the world and laid them end to end (but not in any dirty kind of way), you would be surprised to find that not one of them was Me.

Thursday, August 9, 2012


Wake with a start at one AM. Saturday night!  Suddenly remember I am supposed to be hosting a surprise birthday party RIGHT NOW! 
Crawl quietly out of my cave to count heads (easiest way to tell if you ARE still hosting anything, am I right?).  Four heads, and that's just on the sofa.  Lemme see.  I personally borned one, two, three chilren, so, yep, slumber party in progress.  Dang it-I forgot to get up today (again!) and go pick up food, cake, etc. (kicking myself).  It sure is quiet, though, for a room full of tween-aged party people.  The only sound I hear is Mega Mind (my personal favorite movie) playing softly in the dark. 
I am preparing to take vital signs and do some basic neuro checks when I detect movement.  Good, because it's my DAY OFF! 
I greet each party guest with a hearty, albeit belated, welcome, attempting to casually ascertain whether or not any of them has been fed at all since their arrival (at what time, I have NO idea) at my home, or if I need to make a late-night Taco Bell run for the second night in a row (no trouble at all, really-I love that establishment!  When they say they're open late, they mean it, Wendy's!). 
They've had frozen pizza and S'mores, and there's an uncut, undecorated cake in the microwave for some reason.
They all start getting kinda rowdy, because it's only one, remember?  I know for a fact that three of the four stayed up way past three last night. 
Someone loudly shushes from a bedroom, and I go to see who it is.  Turns out to be a chaperone I didn't know about, a chaperone whose idea it probably was to put them to bed early in the first place. 
I approve getting up for snacks, and we all have a nice visit, sharing personal tales of adventure and madness.  I move the kitchen table and set up Befriendon, Upcam, and some Willow Tree figurines for a birthday card shoot.     
Eventually, the chaperone makes everyone go back to bed, even the hostess with the least-mostest, who isn't one BIT tired because I only just woke up, remember?
In the future, no more chaperones allowed unless they keep to themselves and let the children stay up as late as they want, AND sleep in as late as they want the next morning.
This is still only the second worst surprise party I ever hosted, number one being the party where the guest of honor never did show up.

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